Things I Learned From my Mom

Desiree

Things I Learned From my Mom

Desiree
school-73497_640(Editor's Note: We welcome Desiree to our blogging team today! You can connect with her on her profile page: @desiree.)

I learned to read and write, draw and paint, very young. I learned to enjoy the novels of James Michener while my friends struggled with Dick and Jane, and  painted portraits of my pets while they made hash of their coloring books. I learned that academic and artistic ability did not earn me admiration or love.

I learned the folly of relying too much on other people to make me happy. If other people liked and loved me, that was wonderful. But if they didn't, striving and struggling to gain their approval and affection was futile. If anything, it just drove them further away.

I learned early on, to take care of my own needs, from laundry and cooking to coping with loss and rejection.

I learned that just because someone is your parent, does not necessarily mean that they like you, approve of you, or want to have you around. I learned how to self-medicate with alcohol and other things, and how that is a really lousy coping strategy.

I learned that God is my only sure and certain source of love. And that I can cry, whine, wail and scream at Him, and he won't hang up on me, or tell me to "get over it!".

I learned that the only person I can change is myself.

I learned that I can endure all sorts of $#!+, and still love someone. Even if I don't always like them very much. I learned that taking all that $#!+ is not, and never has been, a measure of love. And that I don't have to accept it.

I learned that forgiveness is something I do for my own benefit because pain and rage are just too damn exhausting. And life is too short.

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jan

preach it. if only these wise lessons could be instilled in our children, so they don't waste years of their life. what we wouldn't give for that. but alas, we cannot.

Jean

Wise and beautifully put, Desiree. Thanks for sharing.

Denise

I am sooooo glad you are blogging! I just love getting to know you through your comments_mysql and am looking forward to learning more through your blogs.\r\n\r\nYou have an amazing wisdom that I'm so glad you are sharing here with us. :)\r\n\r\nWishing you a better day today.