Thud

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Thud

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dolomites-550343_640Sometimes the thud comes from your caree.

Sometimes the thud come from you.

Sometimes, the thud comes from both of you.

A family member, scheduled to visit your caree, is a no-show. Thud. Your hearts fall. You so wish you could catch your caree's heart and spare her the pain.

The doctor delivers more bad news. Thud. Your hearts fall too far and too fast for either of you to catch.

The home health aid you loved leaves the agency for a better-paying job. Your caree is unfazed. You, however, can only hear the thunder of the thud.

It's the thuds in the night, the thuds from the phone calls, the thuds in the hospital. How many thuds do each of us have in a lifetime, you wonder. Haven't we run out yet? Please?

And the thuds continue. They keep coming.

How will you survive these thuds, which seem to steal time from your caree and years from you?

You do all you can to protect your caree. You do what you can to comfort your heart.

You remind yourself that the thuds aren't your fault, aren't the result of your mistakes. You do your very best every day to ensure your caree remains safe, receives the best possible care, remains as comfortable as possible. Keep trying, continue to do your best.

And, when the thuds become the thumps of a grateful and loving heart, take note.

It can feel like it's all thuds. Know you'll have your thumps, too.

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3 Comments

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Mar

I love the way you end us with hope, Denise ...

Hussy

The thud-thump-thud-thump-thud-thump rhythm really knocks the wind out of you some days :)

Mary1072

Thank you, Denise!