You Are More Than That


You Are More Than That

(Editor's Note: Today, we welcome Leanne, who cares for her sister, to our blogging team. You can connect with Leanne on her profile page: @lmhinkel.)

boje-116664_640Thanks so much to @marfromwi for writing the blog post, We Are More Than That. I really needed it.

Between being a full-time caregiver and starting a new job, I have really lost touch with Leanne, the person. By the end of the work day, I'm exhausted and my other job is still continuing.

I feel so lost and ashamed. Lost because I don't know who I am any more and ashamed because I give in to the frustrations of repeating things over and over, explaining the TV program and showing my sister where her bedroom is, and often show my impatience.

My heart breaks for my sister because she is so aware of her Alzheimer's progression and I cannot even begin to imagine what it must be like for her.

At the same time, I am trying to carve out some time each week to go out by myself for a massage.

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I've been taking care of my young onset Alzheimer's affected spouse for less than two years, and I know I haven't figured it out. There is rarely, even this note is rare, enough time at the end of the day, week, month to accomplish everything I used to do. I get frustrated that I can't commit to things in the time they used to take. My expectations have come way down, and I know they will have to go lower before it's all done.\r\n\r\nBut, ya know, it's all good. I'm more in touch with my priorities, more connected to my wife and son and both sides of my family, more engaged with my friends, and I'm a better leader for my staff and company. When you really, no kidding, have to care for another person, you learn what humanity is about and you get to set aside all the craziness we allow to take away from that humanity.\r\n\r\nAnd what's so bad about that?


I can understand about your frustrations and showing your impatience. I do the same thing with my Grandma. Then I feel ashamed because she deserves better than that but I also know I'm only human so I try again next time to be better. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.


I applaud you for everything you have accomplished. Even being able to say how you feel, and why you feel that way is a big victory, so you are far from lost. You could be very tired, but you are not alone, and we're so glad you've chosen to walk with us in this journey. Keep blogging.


I so know how you feel! Been there too. Blogging really helps


Hi Leanne!\r\n\r\nI am so glad you are blogging. I think writing out the day will help you find yourself again. :)\r\n\r\nI love the idea of a weekly massage--what a great idea. It's relaxing, invigorating and healing. \r\n\r\nIt's so hard to have all the patience that the day requires. We have a limited amount of patience and a long day will deplete it faster than anything. I wonder if it would help to use note cards and signs to help your sister remember? Perhaps signs that point to her room and a sign at her room would help? Just trying to think of ways to have help for you that's easy and doable.\r\n\r\nHow long have you been caring for your sister?